A Sucker Every Minute

Ladies and gents, I'm pleased to announce that Monkeesims is now on Facebook. Of course, you won't find anything there that you won't see just visiting the site here, but hopefully the Facebook profile will help guide those poor lost souls who have yet to hear of MS into our fold. Anyway, today is my Friday, because I have Wednesday and Thursday off from work, and I know Tuesday night isn't a big deal for most folks, but I'm loving every minute of it. It's been a particularly long week, and not in the enjoyable way (allow me to pause so you all can pull out those violins...)

In our last post, we met Natalie Jones, and began following (in progress) her quest to acquire 20 simultaneous romances in an effort to achieve lifelong happiness. When we left off, she was getting friendly with "Junkyard" Jack Johnson, well on her way to making him her 17th romantic partner. Did she succeed? Well, only one way to find out...let's take a look at the scorecard below...

Seventeen down, three to go!

Yes, Natalie is well on her way there, and Jack just brought her that much closer. Only time (and this blog) will tell who the "lucky" final three will be. But enough about that for now. We have new business to attend to in today's post. It involves another of the families I've introduced to Pleasantview, a family whose members may or may not play a big part in the future of Monkeesims. I speak of the Schreck/Sullen family. Before we meet the actual family members, let's take a look at their home. As with Jack's place, we can learn a lot about this family just by looking at their upstairs bedrooms. Observe.

Was someone coffin upstairs?

Yes, you guessed it - the Schreck/Sullen house doubles as a funeral home! Okay, no it doesn't, if you guessed that they are a family of vampires, give yourself some points (but not too many). The head of the household is a charming chap by the name of Max Schreck, complete with fangs, bald head, and pointy ears, features not to be found on any of my previous vampires (although they should have been). Schreck has but one love in life, his books, which he spends every moment of every waking hour reading.

Yes, ladies, he's single! Rawr!

Yes, Max is a real charmer, it's a wonder some lucky lady hasn't scooped him up already. I guess there's no accounting for taste. Part of it might be the fact that he has never once left the house since he first came to town, and the only woman he ever sees is his "daughter", Alice Sullen. She's only his daughter in the sense that he turned her into a vampire and he's twice her age, no blood relationship though (aside from their mutual love of blood). Alice is a little bit of a cold fish herself, although she's fortunate enough to have hair and non-pointy ears.

Alice: "I could use a bite! Maybe I'll order a pizza delivery guy!"

Alice has a social life every bit as active as Max, which is to say none at all. Heck, the family rarely if ever takes the time to speak to one another, content to keep their noses stuck in their books. At least, that's the case with Max and Alice. There is a third member of the family, Alice's brother, Edward Sullen. I know what you're thinking, but no, I did NOT model Edward after Leslie Nielsen from "Dracula: Dead and Loving It"...

Real men don't sparkle...

Unlike the others, Edward isn't content to just sit on his vampiric keister and watch the world go by. He prefers to live life (or undeath, or whatever in his case) to the fullest. He's got nice threads, a sweet ride, and nothing but time on his hands. The only thing he doesn't have currently is someone to share it all with. Okay, so he has Max and Alice, but that's missing the point.

Edward: "I know flying places as a bat is more fuel efficient, but it's so hard to care!"

This seems like the perfect time to introduce everyone to the number one watering hole in Pleasantview, the Free Time Lounge (and karaoke bar). It's nothing special, just a humble little shack with a dance floor, a bar, and some couches. It originally featured a live DJ, switched to having a juke box, then eventually wound up replacing it with a karaoke machine. Here, we see one of the locals, rap sensation, Bodacious "Z", gracing the lounge patrons with his vocal stylings.

Even heavy cream makeup can't disguise real talent...

For a "professional" singer, "Z" was bad. Very, very bad. Thank goodness there was nobody there paying attention to him. Shortly after "Z" finished torturing the microphone, our very own Edward Sullen came waltzing (not literally, thank goodness) into the bar and pulled up a stool, quietly taking in his fellow patrons. It didn't take much time, since there were only two people there presently besides himself, and it didn't take long before Edward was engaged in conversation with Angela Baker, one of the locals.

Angela: "I'm totally into Muay Thai right now...!"

Things went okay with Edward and Angela. Not life changingly fantastic or anything, but not bad either. She did have a tendency to keep bringing up the topic of sports, something Edward had zero interest in (when you're already dead, the need to utilize athletics to stay in shape is somewhat diminished). Eventually, it was just time to move on, and it just so happened at that moment that our very own Natalie Jones wandered into the Free Time Lounge, in search of either love or liquor (or maybe a little of both). She immediately took an interest in Edward.

Edward: "No, I'm not a vampire, I'm a...a...genie! That's it!"

Despite the fact that I had no control over Natalie (really, who does?), she persisted in interacting with Edward repeatedly. Just when I thought she'd grown tired of telling jokes or making small talk, she'd come back for more. Luckily, she didn't do anything offensive like admire him, like so many AI sims are prone to do. I don't know why, but very few sims seem to actually appreciate admiration from anyone but their dearest friends (yet a backrub is still okay for some reason - go figure). The pair seemed to have pretty similar interests overall, and generally hit it off pretty well. Probably because she never mentioned her desire to have 20 simultaneous partners. Some folks don't want to be just another feather in someone's cap...

Edward: "...and I was like, OMG, lady, who cuts your hair, Leatherface?"

Well, despite her best efforts not to jump the gun, Natalie did eventually bring up the topic of romance, but if she was trying to send a hint, Edward wasn't biting (har, har). It's not that he's not interested in women, because Edward is all about the ladies, nor did he find Natalie repulsive. No, Edward is just one of those rare kinds of guy who likes to take a step back and takes things slowly, preferring to avoid haste at cost of waste. You know, the kind of guy who usually winds up spending Saturday night alone watching reruns of CSI...

Natalie: "You sure you don't want to make out just a tiny bit?"

Yes, ladies and gents, we've got an honest to goodness gentleman on our hands here. Way to go, Ed! Tough luck, Natalie, but guess it's time to keep looking for those "final three". So anyway, that basically wraps up this installment of Monkeesims for the evening. Coming up in a near future post, we find ourselves face to face with a couple who we haven't heard from in almost 80 posts. I won't say who, but I'll give you a hint - the guy's name sounds like a food, and his (dull) courtship posts marked some of our very first entries here at Monkeesims. Stay tuned!