Life's a Beach

Last time here at MonkeeSims, we watched as the Jacksons messed around with the genie lamp and the chemistry set a bit. Cheap thrills, I know, but the family has a limited money supply, and if they run out, I'm not helping them (tough love). All those constant parties before have started to take their toll financially, causing things to slow down a bit around the house.

As we drop in on the house, we see Leon is up bright and early, getting ready to make breakfast. Good thing, too, because after all this time, he's still the only one in the house who knows how to cook, and can use the stove top without burning down the joint. This is rather convenient...for everyone but Leon.

Leon: "Why? Why must I slave in the kitchen just because everyone else is too stupid to use a stove?"
Steve just couldn't pull himself away from his newly found chemistry hobby...that is, until the chemistry set blew up in his face. That ended things real quickly. Steve made a big deal over it, apparently oblivious to the fact that a simple call to a repairman would remedy the situation. What a loser.

Steve: "No...NO! Now I have no reason to go on living!"
"Moon Dawg" had yet to get in on the whole genie/chemistry set thing, and decided to correct that oversight. He summoned the genie of the lamp, who offered him a choice between fire and water (too bad I didn't pay enough attention to what he said to fully understand what those choices meant). Anyway, the spell didn't backfire, but it also didn't do much of anything noticeable. The genie said something about warm desert winds or something, and "Moon Dawg" had his social and comfort meters filled, which was pretty much worthless since they were almost full to begin with.

Jamal: "Hey, easy with the lightning there, mon!"
All the genie's talk about warm desert winds got the gang thinking about how nice it would be to hang out in the sand and sun of the local beach resort. Sure, $500 is a vulgar extravagance, considering I just said not long ago that the gang was running short of funds, but I figured if they were going to go broke, they might as well go out with a bang. Besides, if you mooch just right, from what I've seen, you can live at the resorts indefinitely (with the Peter Miller method of food swiping).

The resort was hopping, and there were many amusing attractions. The one that really caught my eye was the mascot, Marky the Sharky, swimming around in the pool. I'm sure that's no easy task when you're wearing a great big cloth mascot outfit that probably gets water logged easily. Too bad there's no lifeguard to be seen anywhere in the area...

What kid doesn't love to swim with a big scary shark man paddling around in the pool?
As if that wasn't odd enough, I witnessed the vacation director climbing down the ladder to get into the pool so she could talk to some visitors who were swimming. Wow, talk about dedication to her job! She'll go to any lengths to annoy the guests! Maybe she wanted to get in there so she could warn the guests about the shark man recently sighted in the pool.

Maybe the vacation director has just been standing out in the sun too long...
Like so many of the families I've sent off on vacation before, the Jacksons seemed inclined to do stuff that they could be doing for free at home, in this case, sitting in the hot tub. I guess since this tub is made of rugged looking wooden planks, this counts as roughing it. Sort of...

Kareem: "Dude, you said there would be chicks here..."
Steve, however, actually took advantage of being at the resort, and rented a metal detector. He spent quite a bit of time with it, but he couldn't even locate a lousy old boot. He did come across money quite a few times, though, which is much better than nothing. I've never done the math to see how many times you'd have to dig up cash to make the metal detector pay for itself, but I'm pretty sure Steve had found enough by the time he was done with it.

Steve: "Yes! Eight bucks! The house is saved!"
Being on vacation does have it's advantages in a lot of ways. Leon, for example, was thrilled by the fact that he didn't have to cook for once. Given that the house is occupied by three bachelors, you'd think from time to time they'd do the bachelor thing and at least order a pizza, but no. Poor Leon.

Leon: "See? I told you guys there would be chicks here!"
Eventually, the gang decided to opt for some more active amusement than just sitting in the hot tub or eating, and headed for the volleyball court. In order to save on the cost of renting a volleyball (cheapskates), they waited until some kids rented one, and then got in on the game. On a side note, those two kids you see playing there are the children of the mohawk guy and "sherbet head" who were at the snow resort during the Wilsons' last vacation.

Leon: "Yeah! We're gonna' murder you bums...!"
The game got underway, and the competition was fierce. Apparently, the girls weren't feeling quite as competitive as the Jacksons were, and took a dim view of the "in your face" playing style the guys were displaying. Leon's partner was quick to leave the game, turning it into a two-on-one match.

Girl: "...and what is up with that afro, anyway?"
Well, that was all right with Leon, since he's the "great one" (at least in his head he is). The game escalated into a brutal spike-fest, as the ball flew fast and furious back and forth over the net. I think in the end, Leon lost, but he got his share of digs in during the game, so that was alright with him. It's not liked they paid to play the game or anything anyway.

Leon: "Prepare to eat ball, you pansies!"
Wow, after all this excitement, how will the family ever adapt to normal life again? By throwing a disco party, of course! (duh!) As usual, there's more to it than that, but for the moment, no more shall be revealed. See ya'!