Clint the Lonesome Cowboy

Hey, folks. Welcome back to MonkeeSims, where the fun never ends. Well, it does end once you've come to the end of the posts you've read, but that's beside the point. Anyway, enough babble...let's get right down to it, shall we?

It's been a while since we saw the likes of cowboy Clint for more than a few minutes, and while I'm sure none of the rest of you have lost any sleep over this, I tend to feel a little neglectful when I go for long periods of time without giving any serious attention to certain sims. Clint is one of those sims. While I've dropped in on his place from time to time since that first post, my "visits" haven't been very productive, and he's still a lonely and unsuccessful cowboy. Let's see if we can fix that, shall we?

Well, Clint was a cowboy with a...

Ah, the heck with that. Forget about the rhyming. I think Clint deserves a more detailed and less annoying post this time. Anyway, as we first drop in on Clint, we find him just getting up and rather cranky...probably because his life is so unsatisfying. Or maybe it's because he's not happy to see us snooping around his place with the camera again. It's hard to say with folks like Clint.

Clint: "Why? Why can't you people just leave me alone!"

Maybe Clint was cranky because he's so lonely. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that was what it was. His low paying job as a pet groomer gave him little time to socialize, and the friends he had made never came around. Clint's first attempt at getting some long term companionship was to trap El Bandito the raccoon and keep him as a pet.

Clint: "Hmmm...although those coons are good eatin'..."

Before Clint made a decision he would later regret (raccoon isn't all that great when not properly prepared), a neighbor he'd never met before stopped by, Claire Charming (she was in a couple posts before, but I actually checked her name since then). Clint was quick to strike up a conversation, and all too happy to explain why he had a coon fenced in on his front lawn.

Clint: "Yeah, I saved the little varmint from becoming road kill!"

Well, Clint may not be used to hosting company, but he does have some sense of common decency. He was so busy chatting with Claire over and over that she didn't go home like visitors usually do when it gets late, and she stayed at his house all night long. Clint decided he owed it to her to make her some breakfast, so it was off to the kitchen to cook up his specialty, one of the only things he knew how to make - his five alarm chili...

Clint: "You don't want any? I promise there's no coon in it!"

Well, Clint whipped up some salad instead, which still isn't that great for breakfast, but it beats chili. Claire was treated to some fine outdoor dining, since Clint still doesn't have any sort of table indoors, but she didn't seem too concerned about it. The great thing about having an outdoor eating area is that if you don't pick up after yourself right away, at least most of the flies stay outside...most of the time.

Clint: "So, then I was thinking I should get myself some of those cool sunglasses..."

Things really seemed to be going well, and I was starting to hold out hope that maybe Claire and Clint might strike up some sort of long term relationship. That is, until Claire decided to gossip about El Bandito which was a huge turn-off for Clint. So close, and yet so far away. She should have guessed that if he'd gone to the trouble of building a little picket fence around the furry little varmint, he probably had some sort of meaningful attachment to him.

Clint: "Now, just hold it right there! That's family you're talkin' about!"

Rather than let Claire feel stupid about her small minded comments about his mangy raccoon, Clint decided to mend things himself. He presented Claire with a wooden gnome he'd made all by himself. Yes, one of the ways I tried to help Clint beat boredom at his cabin was by buying him a woodworking table, and he had all kinds of gnomes in his pockets for occasions just like this one.

Claire: "Gee...you just never know what to say when a cowboy gives you a garden gnome after you insult his raccoon!"

Apparently, that did the trick, and the two went back to being friends again. Clint decided to take things to the next level...a dirty cab ride downtown. Considering it's been never that he's gotten out of the house for anything besides work, I'd say it was long overdue. Poor El Bandito was left all alone at the cabin with nobody but the maid to keep him company, and she was too busy to even pick up the papers on the front lawn, let alone play with a raccoon.

Clint: "I woulda' preferred to take a horse downtown, but this was all they had..."

The pair went down to one of the beach front areas for a little fun in the sun. Claire seemed awfully excited to see Clint there, considering they'd ridden down there together in the same cab. Maybe she was afraid he was planning to ditch her when they got there or something...or maybe she was just excited to be downtown, though she seems to be there every time my other sims visit the mall or old market square, so it can't be too rare an occurrence for her...

Claire: "I wonder what his face looks like under that hat?"

Well, I'm not sure if Claire had any idea just how cheap Clint can be before she accepted his invitation downtown, but she sure found out in short order. He headed right over to the sidewalk chess set, and proceeded to start up a game, which didn't cost him anything...and it's one of the few things he could have actually done back at his cabin. You're at a beach, Clint...come on...do something beachy!

Claire: "Yawn...I'm so glad I came to the beach so I could play chess on the sidewalk..."

There were plenty of other things to do, and the place was hoppin'. Other notable sims there were Gunther Goth Sr. and Peter Miller. Pete was hanging out in the game room with some chicks, but make no mistake...he was a lot more interested in the pinball machines than he was the girls. That Peter certainly has some priorities all his own.

Peter: "Can you ladies hold it down over there? I can't hear the pinball machine!"

Claire finally coaxed Clint away from the chess board, and they decided maybe it was time to go for a swim. Well, Clint certainly couldn't do that in his cowboy gear, and he apparently hadn't brought a suit with him, so he headed off to buy one. Being the modest sort, Clint purchased the suit that was the closest thing to swimming fully clothed. Those cowboys can be such prudes...

Clint: "I don't know...are you sure it doesn't show too much skin?"

Claire needed a suit too, of course, so Clint picked one out for her...a nice polka-dot number (which must have been a relief to her considering the rack had an ugly female version of the suit Clint had chosen for himself). Clint applauded wildly as Claire modeled the suit for him. Meanwhile, Peter and Gunther Goth Sr. discussed their views on movies while standing in front of the changing rooms.

Gunther: "Are you sure you haven't seen any of my independent films?"

Once Clint and Claire had their suits on, they headed to the ice cream vendor to get some ice cream. After all, everyone knows that old rule about how you're supposed to make sure you eat an hour before you go swimming. Wait...that's not how it goes, is it? Shoot...I can't remember. Oh, well...I guess we'll just watch these guys when they get in the pool and see what happens.

Clint: "Hey, uh...your ice cream is kind of touching mine there..."

Well, the gang got in the pool, but nothing bad happened. Well, Clint hopped off the diving board, and it was kind of lame, but by no means bad. Claire followed up with a high flying dive that seemed calculated to make Clint look even worse, which is a great way to improve a friendship. These two have only known each other for one post...it's a little early to start getting competitive, isn't it?

Claire: "Let me just show you how it's done..."

Well, once pool time was over, Clint snuck over to the gift shop and bought some chocolates to give Claire. Sure, it's a little cliché, but Clint is just a simple cowboy, and the gesture alone probably took him a great deal of thought. Whatever the case, she seemed appreciative, which is a good thing. Clint isn't exactly rolling in dough, and every romantic effort he makes that costs anything had better pay off at least a little.

Claire: "Thanks, but when I said I was hungry, I was kind of hoping we'd get some real food!"

For some weird reason, Clint decided that the date was over...and it had been going so well, too. Maybe he didn't want things to move too fast...or maybe he thought it was getting a bit late...or perhaps it's because I was playing before work in the morning and it was almost time to go and there was no way to save the game. Whatever the case, Claire was a bit dissappointed, and Clint lost some points as a result. Tough luck there, cowboy!

Claire: "Well, that date sure went down the toilet fast!"

Poor Clint! I guess he still has a thing or two to learn about women, like how they don't like having dates end abruptly when things are just starting to go well. Heck, he even bought her a bikini he could barely afford, but apparently that wasn't enough. Well, Claire or no Claire, Clint wasn't entirely alone, and if nothing else, he did get some new swimwear for himself out of the deal.

Clint: "Well, El Bandito, at least we still have each other!"

Well, Clint's efforts at romance may not have met with roaring success in this particular post, but hey, what's the rush? There will be plenty of time for more of that in our next post, when we catch up with Clint (and EL Bandito) again. You won't want to miss it...or maybe you will...who am I to tell you what to do? See ya'!