Leon Loses in Love

Welcome back, everyone. Well, I've had some kind of stomach flu-like thing for the past week, and it's anything but pleasant. This is probably one time when it's better that I post less about my own personal experiences and more Sims stuff, because there's not much good to say about it. Almost fell asleep at my PC a bit ago, which may not sound like a bad thing, but I'm at work, so that is kind of bad. Anyway...

Blogger is being really wonky lately, and sometimes won't publish my posts, sometimes double publishes them, and sometimes just plain irks me off. I was trying to delete some duplicates of yesterday's post, and it said that I had one fewer post total than I thought I should, so if anyone notices one missing from the archives, let me know (I didn't notice any obvious omissions, so nobody else probably will either).

You all remember the Jacksons, right? Surely...after all, their family has been the focus of some of the more disastrous experiences on MonkeeSims (with the exception of the Curse of Bozo series). In case you've forgotten, when last we saw them, Leon, Steve, and Doris Jackson were involved in a love triangle that resulted in a lot of hard feelings and ended with the death of Steve in a barbecue fire (he came back later, obviously). As we revisit the family, we find that Leon has given up hitting on Doris or causing problems with the genie lamp for now, and bought a guinea pig to amuse himself instead.

Leon: "Careful...you bite me, and we're having guinea pig stew for dinner!"

Well, that didn't last long. Leon found that while guinea pigs may look like balls of furry fun at first glance, in the end, all that playing with them does is make your hands stink and get fur on your clothes. If you ask me, the guinea pig was just a rebound pet after the death of Parrot Jackson anyway. Leon's a weakling, and next thing you know, he was right back to the lamp, hoping for a quick fix for his problems. Has he learned nothing from almost every previous experience with the genie?

Genie: "That's for interrupting my beauty sleep...!"

I'm starting to think that the genie's "backfired" spell excuse is just a bunch of crap. I know the odds of a spell going bad are supposed to be higher than the odds of things going good, but the Jacksons have absolutely no luck when it comes to the genie. This time was no exception, and the genie's spell infested the rec room with roaches. I suppose it could have been worse. Nothing caught on fire, and there were no ruined relationships as a result of the spell. Of course, experience tells us that the Jacksons don't need magic to accomplish either of those things...

Leon: "Great! Just what I needed...more pets!"

Leon thought about just leaving the roaches and going about his business, but then he decided he was bored anyway, and started spraying them. Meanwhile, out back, Steve was cooking up some burgers on his grill that had miraculously survived the horrific blaze in the last Jackson posts. You got to hand it to Steve...most people would probably hesitate to start doing something again that had recently killed them, but Steve must just be a brave sort. Either that, he just assumes if he dies again in a grill fire that he'll just come back again. Never assume anything, Steve...

Steve: "I can't believe nobody saved me a burger after I died last time!"

Meanwhile, Leon had STILL not learned his lesson. As soon as possible, he was right back at the genie lamp, bugging the poor purple guy (of course, the genie had just recently "bugged" him, so it's only fair). Leon is lucky that there's that clause in the genie code that says that they can't strike annoying people dead on the spot. Actually, maybe Leon is some sort of self-hating lunatic, and just wants bad stuff to happen to him. If that's the case, he's never disappointed. Whatever the case, Leon made one last desperate plea to the genie to change his fortunes for him.

Leon: "Come on, man...help a brother out!"

Well, the genie decided to take the opportunity to use his magic for good, but not in a way that Leon would appreciate. No, he decided it was high time he "undid" the damage that Steve's love potion had done earlier, and made Doris fall out of love with Leon. Of course, this only solves half the problem, since it left Leon still madly in love with Doris, but it certainly wasn't the first time Leon had the hots for someone who didn't care about him, so it worked out pretty well. Love in the sim world is such a crazy and unpredictable thing.

Doris: "Yawn...that Leon is such a dirty rotten pig who I'm not at all in love with..."

That was it. Leon finally decided he'd had enough of the stupid genie, and sold the lamp for a few bucks he could use later to buy a pizza or something. Doris, however, freed from her potion induced obsession with Leon, was able to focus more fully on her career, and enjoyed great success as a model. She even managed to get a bronze figure award for her efforts, which she was forced to display on the bedroom floor due to lack of counter space to place it on (despite the new empty spot where the genie lamp had been).

Doris: "Somehow, it's just doesn't feel like a place of honor for an award."

Leon was all too aware of the fact that Doris was no longer interested in him, and although he had promised to back off, there was no denying it was a painful blow. Leon decided he needed to reestablish his manhood by calling up his actual girlfriend, Brooke, and showing that he still had what it took to sweep the ladies off their feet. Well, Brooke told Leon when he called that she was having a party, and asked if she could bring her guests with her. Well, Leon said yes, but when she showed up, there was only one person with her, and not a particularly fun looking person for that matter.

Leon: "Er...I think it takes more than one host and one guest to qualify as a 'party'..."

Leon and Brooke got to talking (the guest she brought was completely ignored by all the family members), and she found out about the little fling he and Doris had had before the genie intervened. She took it surprisingly well...sort of. Actually, since she didn't have access to any abusive interactions to use on Leon, she took it out on the gnomes "Moon Dawg" had been working on. There were quite a few gnomes there, and the resulting chain reaction was huge. So much so that Brooke was continuously tossed on her butt, which I don't think improved her mood much...

Gnome: "Hey, lady...leave us outta' this! Leon's the pig around here!"

Well, fortunately, ladies men excel in three main areas - wooing the women, getting in trouble, and squirming out of trouble. Leon wasn't so great at the first, but he was a pro at the second two. Seeing that he'd made a mess of things with his foolish honesty, Leon quickly swooped in to make everything better. It didn't hurt that a lot of Brooke's frustration had already been spent on the gnomes. As usual, words could not express properly how Leon wanted to make things right again, so he didn't bother with any...what a shmuck.

Leon: "A little sugar always makes everything better..."

Well, Leon may have thought that everything was okay from there, but he was about to find himself in a very uncomfortable situation. You see, given all the drama their relationship had experienced thus far, Brooke was very interested to know where the relationship was going (besides down the toilet). Leon would have been very interested in turning around and running like heck when she started asking that question, but he was too late...he had no choice but to give her some kind of answer, or suffer the consequences...

Brooke: "What do you mean, 'I think you're fine, babe'? Do you love me, or don't you?"

That was it for that. Brooke decided she was tired of wasting her time waiting for Leon to figure out what he was doing, and so, Leon was once again completely single. Wow...I almost feel sorry for Leon, though he brought most of this on himself, so I don't feel too sorry for him. It's doubtful that if he and Brooke stayed together for the long haul that she would get too much out of it. Coming up next, we'll watch (and laugh) as the Jacksons slide further down the slope of dysfunction, followed by a post of epic proportions with another family. Be there!