Of Pets and Gnomes
I'm pretty tired today...didn't get too much sleep last night, but my usual two mugs of coffee this morning gave me a little jolt. It doesn't matter anyway, though...the show must go on! (by "show", I mean my job, which is where I post this stuff from). I know I already put one really long post up today, but that was actually written mostly yesterday and a little today, so this is really the "post of the day". When did this become a daily thing, anyway? That was never really my goal, but seems to be the way it's been going lately.
Anyway, you didn't come here to listen to me ramble on (at least not about my job and stuff). Let's get on with the post. I had a bit of a time thinking of a suitable name for this hodgepodge of different happenings, because there's really no real theme...just a sort of lazy and very weird day post. By the way, I know we've been focusing on the Millers a lot lately, but if you think about how much time we spent on the Wilsons before, it still doesn't really seem like we've dwelt on the Millers too much. I know some folks expressed some interest in bringing back the Wilsons, and we will eventually. Maybe there will be an appearance from cowboy Clint again too, and hopefully some brand new families down the road even.
Let's begin our lazy day with a totally off the wall start to the day. Peter gets up at the crack of dawn (or earlier even, since it's still dark out) so he can have first dibs on a piece of cake that's been sitting out on the table for ages. At this time of morning, the only competition he's going to have for that stuff is the flies swarming around it.
Later that day, the family paid another uneventful visit to the Old Town pet center. Mr Scruffers had been peeing on the rug an awful lot lately, and they were hoping the animal trainer guy could help them out with that. Well, he was no help at all, so the family did the next best thing, and Bobby adopted another cat to help make a mess of the place. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Skunkbear!
Stu was getting a little bored with the activities the Miller house had to offer, and used his influence as chief bread-winner to actually buy something for himself...a wood working table. It was that or the preserves table, but Stu is all about the manly activities, and he wanted something he could get his hands dirty with (besides touching any given surface in the house at any given time).
Well, Stu discovered he had a gift for creating lifelike wooden gnomes, and so he ran with it (not literally, though...you never want to run with a gnome because the hat could put your eye out). Before long, he had a small army of them standing about at attention, waiting to do his bidding, which they surely would, if they weren't made out of wood.
Before long, those darn gnomes were popping up everywhere. Out back, out front, everywhere but in the bathroom (Stu probably just hasn't gotten that far yet, though). Here, we've got one eyeballing Deana from behind, while she looks through the telescope in broad daylight. She seems oblivious to both the growing army of gnomes and the growing army of mangy neighborhood strays that seem to be setting up camp on the front lawn. All I can say is she'd better watch her step.
Speaking of things "relieving themselves", I eventually had to get up from the PC to do so myself. When I returned, Stu was nowhere to be found, but where he had once stood was an obscene amount of gnomes. Perhaps they rebelled and turned on their creator. Perhaps they used their gnome magic and turned him into that block of wood sitting on the table. Perhaps he just went to the bathroom. Whatever the case, Peter and Bobby didn't seem too overly concerned.
Oh, how I love the gnomes! They're so much more fun than preserves. I haven't used the table yet, but I'm pretty sure I'd feel the same way if I did (I hate jellied fruit). Someone came home in a bad mood and kicked the gnomes out front, and they all exploded! Hmmm...maybe those blocks of stuff Stu was carving gnomes out of weren't wood after all, but C4 plastic explosive! It's hard to say. Whatever the case, you'd better believe that they were quickly replaced!
Next up - Bobby and Deana go downtown. Be there, or be square!